Begin, she said, with a question on purpose: "What does this family, group or group of friends need?" this year upon On this occasion That response will be concrete stones to reveal how the event should be managed. Then ask some of your invitees how they want the meeting to feel or to be, and then continue. If they say: & # 39; What do you mean? It's a tradition, & # 39; so ask: & # 39; Why is this a tradition? If culture needs to be absorbed (not all), you have now created the most appropriate conditions for change.
These & # 39; s open-ended tools foster engagement where they may be decentralized; involvement rather than usual. "So, for example, if the purpose of this year is generosity, everyone's dinner," Ms. Parker said. Find someone who has nowhere to celebrate Thanksgiving this year. Then literally shut the room. ”
That relationship is what Ms. Parker calls it "open" and it is the place where we recommend that we offer an "extraordinary amount" of thought. "If you're the host, how do you make sense in those first few minutes?" She said. You stand in the doorway and give your guests courage. You have a drink. But, just in time, summarize your glass and tell everyone: & # 39; Hey, it's yours here. You do not have an accident to be here. ”
Ms. Parker is a facilitator of the group and is a major in conflict resolution; She realized that getting together is not always easy – especially when it comes to those we love. Families are diverse, confused and ever changing, and like any other group, needs are not the same, she said. They change over time. ”
It is important to understand what most families need this Year, considering recent events and losses. "If it's the first year after her grandmother died, do we want to still do the same thing?" She said. Or, if it was a really difficult year for many family members, perhaps the greatest need is to just be together and have fun and be banned from politics. Or, if we don't talk about certain things, we have created a great distance within the family, and our greatest need may be to have meaningful conversations. ”
In those minutes the connection is not limited to the table. They can happen when they are cooking or running in stores – great time, Ms. Parker says, to connect with people who don't always get to spend time together. Each of the actions and activities are justified looga think about how we start to connect or re-connect them with family or group of friends or everyone together.
Open, and Others Want It, Also
Alice Julier, psychologist and author of "Joint Cooking: Food, Friendship, and Equity," explains that table connectivity can help us change our outlook on the world around us. Family dinners are a place where people gather and learn about the rules of life, she said.